Wednesday, June 4, 2008

The Seventh and FINAL Installment!

Here it is, folks! Albeit a day late... So, technically I have failed in my quest to write an installment a day, but I still think that writing 7 pieces in 8 days is a pretty good accomplishment... It's like I kept the Sabbath day holy, except that it wasn't the Sabbath, it was Tuesday... And it wasn't holy, I just went out to see my friends play at the Sub-t and got a little drunk...

Whatever, it doesn't matter at this point! Please look forward to a full, re-worked version of these in the next couple of weeks, and look even more forward to my next project/endeavor, which will be a collaboration of sorts that I will tell you about after you read this...


“You’ll never guess what happened to me…” Shawn said as he walked into the restaurant.”

“Oh, whatever,” Maria brushed off her co-worker. “Like I care, my friend just came in and bled her heart out to me…”

“Fine then” Shawn said in a snooty tone, waiting for Maria to pick up on the fact that he had something juicy.

“Fine!” Maria said through a long sigh, “what happened?”

“She asked me out!” Shawn was giddy, as if he were the winner of some surprise raffle at an elementary school.

“What?!” Maria asked, dumbfounded.

“Amy… The super-attractive woman from the other night who was ‘too old for me…’ She asked me out…”

“What?” Maria repeated herself, genuinely surprised. “You can’t be serious…”

“I’m incredibly serious…” Shawn reassured her. “She came back in after you left…”

“When you closed for me?”

“Which reminds me,” Shawn said nonchalantly, “Thanks for that…”

“Oh my God,” Maria sighed, “You HAVE GOT to be kidding me…”

“No,” Shawn insisted, “I’m serious… She came back in, just like we joked about, and asked me out…”

“And?” Maria asked, ready for juicy details.

“We went out last night…” he said with a shrug, knowing that she would pry for more.

“I can’t believe she just came back in…” Maria shook her head, truly dumbfounded. She stared off in thought for a minute before she looked back at Shawn and said, “I’m amazed…”

“Hey,” he said defensively. “It’s not SO surprising… So, what happened with you friend? Someone was bleeding in here?” He changed the subject.

“Bleeding her heart out… My friend Jeanie was in here complaining about her former lover.”

“Hot-Jeanie who makes clothes?” Shawn casually confirmed.

“Yeah, the one who owns the boutique down the street from here. She saw this guy today who she had a fling with a few months ago, and apparently she’s not over him since he came into her shop earlier…”

“He just showed up unannounced?”

“He was delivering a package,” Maria explained. “He’s the UPS guy…”

“She snogged the UPS guy?” Shawn laughed. “That’s so cliché…”

“Oh whatever,” she sighed. “Who are you to talk? You’re hooking up with random, older women you serve at your tables…”

“I fail to see the negativity here…”

“Fine,” Maria was annoyed. “You’re an idiot. See it now?”

“Nope, I don’t see that either…”

“Shut up,” she laughed. “So what happened with your sexy, older woman? Did you guys ‘snog’ yet?”

“You know, if you ever stopped making fun of or belittling me, Maria, I think I’d probably start to worry about you…” he told her, sounding completely honest. “And the answer is no, we haven’t. It was only one date… BUT, we’re going on another one tomorrow.”

“So, does she have babies and stuff?”

“No kids, never married,” he grinned.

“What’s wrong with her then?” Maria feigned concern. “Venereal disease?”

“No,” Shawn laughed. “Nothing’s wrong with her. She dated this one guy for five years, and hasn’t really met anyone else since they broke up.”

“Why’d they break up? Maybe she’s crazy, or super controlling.”

“Or MAYBE, she found out he was screwing one of her best friends…” Shawn said. “And she found out that it had been going on for almost a year after she caught him.”

“Wow,” Maria let up a little. “That really sucks. Maybe she wasn’t very good in the sack…”

“Okay,” Shawn waved his hand in front of her, “Give it a rest.”

“You’ve got a table,” she nodded over to a couple who had just sat down up by the front door.

“Ooo, I still need to punch in.” Shawn went over to the computer after Maria moved out of the way, clocked in, and then ran his fingers along the collar of his shirt to make sure it was straight. He started to walk over to the table, but stopped and looked back at his co-worker. “Hey, do you have a pen I could borrow?”

“Here,” she picked up the pen that was sitting next to the computer and handed it to him, “Jeanie left this one.”

“Ew, bite marks,” he said as he took it. “Are they from her?”

“I have no idea,” Maria said, sounding annoyed again. “I haven’t been following the pen around all day…” She shook her head.

“Whatever,” he said, scratching at a piece of paper with the pen. “It doesn’t matter anyways, it’s dead.” He looked up and shrugged before he tossed the pen into the garbage can a few feet away from them. It fell to the bottom alongside empty wine bottles, napkins, and scraps of food, without making a sound.

Shawn walked over to greet his table, and the pen stayed where it was until the garbage can was full, and a busboy took the bag out back to the dumpster, hurling it into the heap of other bags waiting to be picked up.


Thank you all once again for reading! It really has been amazing to hear your comments, and it feels wonderful just to be writing again.

And now, that collaboration I was talking about...

Will there be more fiction? Yes. Will it be in installments again? Yes. Will there be a musical soundtrack to go along with it? Yes. Whaaaaaaa?!?!

That's right. I'm teaming up with my dear friends, Mr. Daniel Swick and Sir Brian Lewis-Jones, to bring you longer and more polished installments (this time on a weekly basis instead of a daily one), which they will write songs to go along with/influence/inspire each one. We are very excited about this project, and you should be too, because Dan and Brian are amazing musicians.



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